Having a Baby
Buying a House
The top three most stressful things you can do apparently. Foolishly maybe me and J have done all 3 in 13 months. It has been incredible and I feel so blessed to be in the position to do it all but it is now taking its toll.
I don't handle change well and I have done a lot of changing recently.
Whether PND or stress or exhaustion the blue times are back. The lack of energy or motivation the lose of appetite the bad sleep (outside of a hungry baby). It all just means that I continue to live in chaos of packing and mess, a chaos which is a contriubting factor to the blue times. A viscious circle.
My brain can't cope with the disorganisation and I have had to cancel and rearrange with friends far too often for my liking. My usual planning and diary filled with fun events is full of tipex as the move comes closer then further away so plans are changed. I HATE changing plans. It makes me feel ill and I get stupidly upset.
We are off to the Doctor this afternoon my superstar husband is coming with and I have an amazing baby girl. I am lucky and so grateful for all I have but I need to look after me to. I want to be laughing with L not crying while she does.