Labour, Love and Fear

My news feeds have been full of beautiful newborns and blossoming bumps. Pictures full of love. But, the space where broodiness was once swelled by these wonderful sights, is now filled with fear and trepidation.

Not fear of the newborn, not fear of the sleepless night, not fear of the growing family and its demands. But fear of the labour.

No birth is a walk in the park, but our labour with L was far from how we imagined it. It remains a confusing and painful memory, and missing memories still trouble me.